Florida

Off to Florida tomorrow. Willie and Linda's villa for 8 days. I was up there last night for dinner and their going on Saturday, they offered to take me and I thought why not I've nothing else to do next week as I have no job. Only been back 9 days and I'm away again it's crazy! Ill have flown all the way round I the world in 10 days and I was off long haul flights for a while. It's something I need to do though, I need to spend time with willie and Linda for the 3 of us sake. We were the closest to Scott and the ones hurting the most. Also at the villa in Florida is where we had some of our happiest memories together, before I came back I struggled to think of things anything to remind me of Scott and it frustrated me that i couldn't. Being home I'm surrounded and it's nice but it's hard,  it's been 8 months but it still feels like it was last week it happened. You just need to get used to that person not being there and cancel the future with them. Linda said to me yesterday at some point ill have to move on and it's true but no way can I do that anytime soon. I don't wanna fall in love again as I don't want the pain that goes with it, the worry and anxiety that I won't just lose them again. How on earth do you let loose after such a trauma? Nah I'm no where near ready but that's ok, I have enough people round me to compensate. 

My Scotty G I love you and miss you even more than I could begin to know as you would say to the moon and back. My love, my life you were my favourite xxxxxxxx